November Greatitudes: 
Day 1. Family
Day 2. Good friends
Day 3. Hospice care
Day 4. Peace of heart
Day 5. Rest
Day 6. Shelter: a home where love abides and grows daily
Day 7. A hug
Day 8. A smile

CAREGIVER NOTES:
He’s basically stopped eating. He’s not impressed at all with the pureed diet he’s currently being given by the dietician. He spits everything out. He asked for toast and jam yesterday, but neither were offered or allowed until he can prove he can swallow successfully again.

We played music (Easy listening) yesterday for most of the day and he seemed to enjoy it and was calm for all but the last two hours I was at the center with him.

I talked with the Activity Director yesterday. He does recognize the value of music for those with dementia issues and they use is in the memory care unit.

As usual, he wasn’t into the Halloween vibe… He missed out on the Pre-school costume parade through the unit yesterday.

POSITIVES:
He was dressed and in a chair when I arrived
He showed determination – lots of it over the course of the day

CAREGIVER NOTE:
I’m not sure if today’s image is more for Him than for me. Yesterday was truly a very difficult day. He was transitioned from the hospital to the rehab center. He was pretty mad and let me know it. He said he didn’t like or love me anymore… but we need to him to try to walk again. We’ll give it a couple of weeks and see how that rolls out and if he’s not able to, we’ll move on to the resources available through palliative care and hospice most likely.

Today will be an incredibly difficult and hard day for him as they settle him into a schedule, adjust meds so they can get his days and nights sorted out (they’ve really been messed up the last 3 days). And hopefully, he’ll bounce back a bit and the dementia will not be quite as prominent. He’s re-lived a lot of memories the last 4 days.

POSITIVES:
He fed himself lunch
Ate half a sandwich with gusto
Asked for food on his own at the rehab center

CAREGIVER NOTE:
complained a bit more about the pain yesterday, thankfully, the tylenol helps when he’s willing to take it. He was up and moving a little more, though. That’s a good thing.

POSITIVES:
Zingers – and they were good
Stayed up with a conversation at dinner and participated
Slept all night

CAREGIVER NOTE:
Tough day and evening, period. His trip into the rabbit hole of a situation he had been concerned about could have been much worse. He went to bed early, too early. Was back up within an hour — after having a vivid dream. The dream opened the rabbit hole. Once he dips a toe into the rabbit hole, it takes what seems forever to close the hole even for a short period of time. He went back to bed about 2 hours later. It wasn’t a good night — he was pretty restless, but wasn’t wandering overnight. He’s already checking his watch this morning and is a bit restless. Fingers crossed today will be a better day.

I think the part that hurt the most last evening was his not recognizing T (his son) even after T reintroduced himself. That was hard.

POSITIVES:
He gave some kudos to a grandchild for a favor delivered
He didn’t lose his temper and lash out.
He wanted to apologize for questioning what he finally realized the situation was resolved and taken care of and he didn’t have to take any further steps

some awesome “no word” moments today.

CAREGIVER NOTES:

I do hope the change in his meds will be a good one — Last night’s vivid dream actually got him out of bed and asking for help. I’m glad I was awake enough to be aware of what was happening and could help him work through things. The “shadows” were gone after turning on the lights and he was open to going back to bed after ensuring him that he had done his part and things were going to be okay and everyone was fine. At least it wasn’t the sort of dream that consisted of yelling, screaming and being angry.

POSITIVES:
Flexible in making some last minute changes in the routine for the day
Excited that T was able to spend most of the day with him
Was interested in watching something other than news for several hours

CAREGIVER NOTES:

It was a tough day — two plugged receptacles in the bathroom and of course the accompanying overflow and dripping into the basement on the second go round. He doesn’t remember trying to flush a half roll of TP on the second overflow of the day. I do have to give him credit for trying to clean up a bit, however. Not sure if the mid-day vivid dream/hallucinations and ensuing conversation was the worst thing or not – however, grateful we just happened to have a virtual visit scheduled with his PCP and thankfully, the dr was willing to make an adjustment to his meds and hopefully, that will help as things go on. I’m very glad the dr is willing to listen and understands how dementia progresses and what her patients needs are and has compassion for their caregivers as they navigate this aging process as well.

POSITIVES:
HIs smile was big and broad for most of the day
He ate well during the course of the day – and asked for healthier snacks
Was interested and contributed to a couple of conversations and shared a laugh or two as well.

CAREGIVER NOTE

The proverbial rabbit hole was present for most of the afternoon and early evening. He kept finding ways to dive right in and it took lots of effort to get him out of there.

Positives for the day:
smiles and laughter along with his one liners
wanting connection and conversation
he ate and wanted a healthy snack