Month: April 2018

hidden pain

As we watch Mom move deeper and deeper into the fog filled forest of Alzheimer’s, I’m forever grateful to have the opportunity to spend these micro-moments with her.

We celebrated her 86th birthday a few days ago… what a gift to have nearly all of us together for a couple of hours to catch up, enjoy seeing Mom’s smiles and even make a few memories along the way.

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We’re grateful to spend time together as a family ….. finding joy in those moments helps ease the pain of the daily loss of the little things.

Recently, I shared a project with her… a small piece of artwork I’d been working on.  I saw the delight in her eyes replaced with a wistful look of remembrance of art she had created not so many years ago.  I’m grateful we still have a few pieces of her art and can share some of those pieces as a memory with her in printed and digital form.  Tears form in her eyes as she traces the images with her fingers, feels the textures on the canvases.  Together, we breathe through the moments and move forward.

adventures @ midnight

Let your good day become a GREAT day!

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Some nights, this mantra has been the only thing that gets us through it… and there’s been a lot happening in the last month or so.  More lucid dreams, hallucinations, wanderings, and conversations…  and they only happen between midnight and 3 am.

So…. We’ve tested pressure pads and detection alarms hoping to find the one(s) that will work best for us in keeping Mom safe as long as she continues to wake at night and feel the need to “take care of something.”  I wish she could tell me about her more lucid dreams and what she needed to take care of.  As it is, I can only  tell her “thank you” for being so responsive to a need and wanting to help; then gently encourage her to go back to bed and get some rest… hopefully, that rest will last a little more than an hour before the next “alarm” sounds.

I’m grateful for technology that helps us keep our home safe and keep Mom safe.  I’m grateful that even with our sometimes too frequent midnight adventures we can open our eyes, be grateful and smile that we have one more day with Mom.