Alzheimer’s/Dementia

be the light…

Light the way for others

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This pathway isn’t always clear… there aren’t always instructions for any given moment.  Sometimes, you just have to “feel your way” with your heart to light the spark for others to find theirs.  I see it daily in her smiles, small accomplishments that often are huge in her eyes.  Laughter, joy, recovering a lost memory if only for a few brief moments and the delight that brings.

I hope that as we continue our journey, these short thoughts might bring some “light” into the heart of someone else now beginning their journey or currently struggling with some aspect of living and caring for a loved one.

 

with deepest gratitude

Feel with your heart, express with kind words, and give with your all.
#gratitude

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As we take these steps in tandem, we’re finding that it is so much easier to see, feel and live with gratitude each and every day.  Service is a pleasure and I’m truly grateful for each #bestday we have the pleasure to take together.  The tears, the laughter, the joy and the extreme sadness as another soul leaves this life for another.  I see her heart break a little more when she hears the name of an old friend or acquaintance passing on.  I also see her give breath and life to the knowledge that she’s not alone and grateful to be surrounded by those who love her dearly.

 

 

Counting….

“Count your blessings, name them one by one…”

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We find ourselves re-framing things in order to shift to a more desired outcome.  We are grateful that even Mom is picking up on that and will pause, breathe it in and then take the next steps.  We are truly blessed to be a part of this phase of her life and I know that as we go through our regular getting dressed or ready for bed routines, that she still finds joy.

 

See with eyes of gratitude

“See” with eyes of  gratitude the “gifts” of each day. I’ve just started the list… what will you add?  #nurturedheart #GrowinGreatness #Greatitudes

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We have the opportunities to make many choices each and every day in this journey of ours.  Yesterday’s choices could have taken us down a whole other road — and neither of us would have been happy about the results.  I’ve no doubt that the choice to let go of the “routine” and schedule planned for her day was the best choice ever.  She just wasn’t into it and any pushing we might try wasn’t going to get us anywhere.

Personally, I don’t ever want her to feel unloved at any point or that she was “putting us out” because she was having a difficult time making choices that we would consider easy and rather mundane.  I was with deepest love and gratitude we honored her for making some difficult decisions yesterday.  I’ve no doubt she struggled to make a few of the choices — they were hers to make in her own time frame.  It would have been so much easier to just sleep and stay in bed.  But she didn’t.

Since she’s spent most of the night awake, today, will likely be a repeat of yesterday — giving us, her caretakers, another opportunity to be eternally grateful that we can spend another day together.

With our deepest gratitude and love.  Thanks, Mom.

Seek the best

Seek, the good, the better, the best. Don’t settle for anything less.
#nurturedheart #GrowinGreatness #bestday #Greatitudes

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One of the things I love the most about living in a Nurtured Heart® way is that we find we are kinder, gentler, more forgiving and yet the boundaries are very clear.  Mom really doesn’t like to move any more frequently than she has to.  Getting up and down is difficult for her and her knees just don’t like to oblige at times.  Yesterday was definitely one of them.  However, we have promised her primary physician that she will “move” every couple of hours throughout her awake times.  So up it is.

Re-framing our statements to I need you to… or let’s do this together makes it so much easier and we often find a smile on her face as we acknowledge her strength and will power to make what may have seemed impossible seconds before HAPPEN in a very positive way.
As she struggles to rise from the chair, we acknowledge the strength and power in her arms and upper body… she works hard every week in PT to keep that upper strength even though she dislikes the exercises, they are helping her.  Every step forward, even the pauses as she contemplates how to move the foot, leg and even toes is met with “You’re cruising!  Look at how deliberately you’re placing your left foot in front of and to the left of your right foot.  Thanks for bringing your foot around the wheel of the walker so carefully.  You didn’t bang a single toe! ”  Acknowledgement and accomplishments rolled into one bring a smile to her face and I’ve not doubt are logged in as “I DID it.”

Even when her legs aren’t cooperating as well as we all would like and the walker becomes a wheelchair for the move, she does shuffle her feet along the way or lifts them which in turn does require more strength and concentration that we are excited to acknowledge and give lots of credit for despite her desire to just stay put in her chair for the day.

It’s not hard to see what’s going well — or to push a little more for her best, because we know it’s there.

We know that as she continues to go along her path, she will never be alone.  That’s the best we can provide for her and we are so happy to have the privilege to walk alongside.

*To learn more about the Nurtured Heart Approach®, click here.

renew

Reflect, renew…. LIVE your purpose
#nurturedheart #GrowinGreatness #Greatitudes

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We’re often asked if we’re still okay with our decision to move cross country to take care of Mom… we’ve never regretted a single day.  Some days are harder than others… but we are very happy with our decision to come home and become full-time caregivers.  It’s a joy!

It’s important to remember that this is part of a long stretch in our journey and it requires us to RENEW daily.  To reflect on our purpose and LIVE with joy in the now.  We know our choices have made a significant difference for Mom.  She is thriving.  The decline that was anticipated at this point in her life isn’t happening as rapidly as once predicted —

Here’s to a fabulous day!  We are ready and encouraged by our own renewals for the great things that are along today’s path.  Hope your day brings joy your way.

 

 

pause….

Take a few minutes and enjoy the every day sort of things that surround you.

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Every day as we get Mom ready for her day, we have the opportunity to check the landscape through a high window in the bathroom.  Sunday, the sky was a brilliant blue and the gold and yellow hued leaves still filled the branches of the tree..  Yesterday, there were fewer leaves on the trees and the sky was a dusty kind of blue with a few scattered clouds.   I’ve no doubt that Mom can envision a beautiful watercolor image on a canvas using her favorite brushes to create a “masterpiece” on a canvas as we “paint” a picture describing the beauty of what lies beyond the glass every day.

Sadly, her abilities to paint have been stripped away by Alzheimer’s.  Her hands shake as she holds the brush and even drawing a line or what we would consider a simple shape now eludes her and no doubt causes her great sadness as tears sometimes welled in her eyes..

What we do know it that she loves the beauty that nature provides her in every day moments and ordinary things. Be it a flower, twig, rock or a pine cone; a leaf, a smile, or a kind word, a snapshot of a family member, friend or the mountains.  They all bring great joy to her heart.

Consider pausing today — look out the window, look at the sky, take a walk. Enjoy and treasure today.

embrace the good

Embrace the good that is in every heart.
#nurturedheart #GrowinGreatness #Greatitudes

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Embrace the moment — That’s been our mantra the last couple of days. We’re both a bit under the weather and definitely not feeling our best.  I can only imagine how difficult it is for Mom when she can’t find the words to pinpoint the problem so we can provide the correct support.  Her frustration is visible as she shrugs her shoulders as we try to pinpoint the current feeling of unwellness…

Deep breaths for both of us and  patience blooms again as we take one more long, deep breath… exhaling and start new.

Together, we’re resetting back to greatness and not getting stuck in the muck when it would really be so much easier to let the funk continue to take us for a longer ride.  Embracing our greatness together brings a release and the ability to begin again.

Here’s to a fresh start — right now.  Not in 5 or 10, but in this moment and most importantly, with LOVE.

today’s intentions lead us to our tomorrows

The thoughts and intentions we have today
will lead us to our tomorrow…
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Being flexible at all different levels has ultimately become this week’s intention — going with the flow so to speak.

Yesterday was one of those days we needed to pull out something else from “bag” and shift the energy around a bit.  We have learned that listening to music will change her energy and make a difference, so that’s exactly what we did.  Within a few minutes she had selected 2 DVDs and was tapping her toes and trying to sing along to most of the songs in the Music Man (an all time favorite and never grows old) and even surprised us with a bit of voice to a song from Annie!  There was even a lightness in her step as we took a walk around the house after it finished.

From my perspective, if our intentions are to provide “best care,” then we need to be prepared to be “in tune” and shift our own energies and intentions for more #bestday choices when those in our care aren’t sure how to go about it.  Here’s to today!  It’ll be a Great one!